


On the Road

by Luminee



Series: late night drabbles [5]
Category: ATEEZ (Band), K-pop
Genre: Implied/Referenced Bullying, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Strangers to Lovers, a lot of stargazing, ah jongho, break your car and find yourself a lover, forever and ever ship jongjoong, hongjoong had a rough life, it turns into fluff quickly, jock! jongho, night scenery, vagabond! hongjoong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:40:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23889874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luminee/pseuds/Luminee
Summary: Hongjoong is wandering on the roads, running away, finding meaning. Instead he finds Jongho.
Relationships: Choi Jongho & Kim Hongjoong, Choi Jongho/Kim Hongjoong
Series: late night drabbles [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783714
Comments: 8
Kudos: 46





	On the Road

**Author's Note:**

> hahaha imagine me re-reading my OS and correcting the mistakes i would never...  
> anyway!  
> i hope you enjoy this i don't have much to say except i can't picture Hongjoong any other way than a broke young man for some reason  
> thanks etoilephilante and aguamenting as usual i love you thank you for supporting my insecurities uwu

The sun was setting and Hongjoong was still on the road. It was one of those road that seemed like they would never end, like he had been lost on it forever, barely crossing the path of another soul, surrounded by arid landscapes. All he could see were rocks and sand. But the young man did not mind. However, he still accelerated a bit in the hope to find a living town before it would be too late. No matter how long he had been on the road; he hated sleeping on his car.

Hongjoong had ran away. As soon as he turned eighteen, he took the chance to escape the foster system he had been caught into for so many years and ran away.

Running away. Trying to fit somewhere. Finding meaning.

He was not quite sure what he was looking for, the only thing he was sure of was he would know what it was when he would have found it. For now, he was cruising.

Hongjoong had left with nothing else than an old car, that was still functioning by a miracle than anything else, a few clothes and a packet of cigarettes. His last foster mother had hated to see him smoke, so he would have made sure to smoke every single of them in front of her. It was not like she had ever tried to be a decent person to him. The young man had left with nothing else but the stabbing pain of years of bullying, the infuriating fear of being rejected and his old demons haunting him. Burning him inside like every cigarette on his fingers.

Going from cities to cities, sometimes staying in one a little bit longer than usual, picking the first job available to make a bit of spare money and continue with his journey. Hongjoong had done everything that no one would have ever wanted.

However, he had yet to find what he was looking for.

It was lonely but Hongjoong had made peace with the idea that some people were not meant for society. That he was one of them. And after years that way, it seemed like it was what was working the best for him.

The young man reached a town when the moon had fully risen. Pulling his car over on a gloomy motel’s parking, he registered for a little room. Just for one night, maybe he would stay longer, for now he had driven for too long to be able to think correctly. Hongjoong fell down on the mattress, falling asleep as soon as he closed his eyes.

Hongjoong woke up by the sound of loud voices, roaring cars parking right in front of his window. Curiosity had always been one of his flaws, among many others, he thought as he peeped behind the curtains.

Jocks. Maybe about five or six. And it made Hongjoong’s blood turn cold.

He watched them laugh and speak loudly, taking out their luggages from their cars, as the memories from the few months he had spent in high school were coming back to his mind. He quickly pushed the curtain. He would be gone before they would start to unpack. The anxiety he had not felt for years was crawling back under his skin and he felt sick at how familiar it still felt.

His breathe short and his eyes watery, he hated himself for still being so weak about it. The words that had been said were buzzing in his mind like he had just heard it; twink, weirdo, crazy. The teasing, the intimidation because they were taller, they were stronger than him and no one would have stand up for the new kid with red hair, too many piercings for his age, odd sense of fashion and especially, not for the guy that would kiss other _guys_.

He tighten his fist, exhaling loudly. This period was behind him. He had ran away from this too.

Once the chatting faded away, Hongjoong went out of his room, quickly walking to his car, only bothering to close the room behind him, leaving the keys on the lock.

The car did what he had feared for a while at the worst moment. No matter how many times he tried to start it, it did not powered up. “C’mon!” he yelled at the wheel punching it with all the strength he had in the silly hope that it would listen.

“Oh fuck you, you could not have done that earlier?!” he choked out.

A few shy knocks on the open window answered him. He turned his head to meet the eyes of one of the jocks. “Do you need help?”

He tried his best not to lower his gaze, the stranger was looking at him with sincerity but he still found it uncomfortable.

“No,” his pride answered, “I’m fine.”

The jock smiled softly, showing his gums and making his eyes sparkle, “you’re sure? Because I heard you struggling from the first floor.”

Hongjoong grinned, “my car is not working but nothing I can’t fix by myself”. He could hear his voice sounding harsh but he did not care. The stranger pouted a bit but nodded.

“I know a thing or two with cars, but okay. If you need help, you can come find me.”

On those words, he winked and turned around. Hongjoong stared at him going back to his room, his arms crossed on his chest. His heart was beating so fast into it and he needed a few more minutes to calm it down. He was sure the jock had stopped in the middle of the staircase to look at him but he closed his eyes, trying to forget the thoughts of this meeting.

The young man admitted his loss against his car only when people started to leave their own rooms, throwing him suspicious looks. Obviously, the vehicle needed more than what he knew. The words of the jock were often replaying on his head but the last thing he wanted was to ask for anyone’s help, and even less, his help.

Locking himself in his room, that he had paid for another night, he tried to go back to sleep. Probably the jocks were just passing by in the city. The town was too small for them, they were just taking a break there and then they would leave. Hongjoong did not have to meet any of them again. He would take care of his car after that.

He managed to find some rest on that thought. When night had fallen once again, Hongjoong sneaked out of his room, his stomach was hurting him, he had not had anything to eat for an entire day. He was looking for a vending machine in the corridors of the motel when the same jock from earlier appeared in front of him. He was, surprisingly, not much taller than him but it felt like his biceps was two sizes bigger than Hongjoong’s.

Hongjoong could not hold a growl when he recognized him. The jock chuckled. “You look very grumpy,” he said.

He raised an eyebrow, probably not visible in the dim light, “I did not ask for any opinion.”

“So, I guess your car is still not working?”

“What makes you say that?!” he snapped back sarcastically. He was too hungry and definitely not in the mood to chat with that guy.

He saw the latter smile, his face lit up by a ray of moon, “you know my offer stands.”

Hongjoong shrugged, “mind your own business,” he answered by passing him on his side to reach the vending machine.

He had hoped the stranger would leave as he paid for a chocolate bar but he stayed there, “are you always unpleasant with everyone? Or is it just me?”

“I do not like jocks,” Hongjoong let outwithout thinking.

“Why?”

He hated how soft and kind the stranger’s voice sounded, so far from his high school memories, so far from how anyone would talk to him. “They’re pretentious, have too much power and abuse of it, think everyone owns them something just because they can run after a ball,” he explained while grabbing the chocolate bar.

The other one stayed silent, his expression had not move at all, yet Hongjoong could spot a very gentle light in the bottom of his pupil, “I’m sorry,” he eventually said.

Hongjoong glared at him. “They must have hurt you a lot, and I’m sorry. For what it’s worth.”

For once, he was unable to find anything cocky to answer. “Is that your only dinner?” asked the guy, pointing the candy in his hand.

“It’s not like I have a car to go find something better.”

Once again, the guy laughed, “well, I do and I was craving for a hamburger, what do you think?”

Hongjoong hesitated. He did not exactly understand what the other man was trying to accomplish and he was not sure about how he felt about it. At the same time, he did not seem to mean any harm, he had only offered his help and had not went away no matter how sharply Hongjoong had answered. He considered the chocolate and the proposition. “It’s my treat,” he added.

They stared at each other for a second, Hongjoong was trying to perceive anything bad in his behaviour but from what the light was offering him to see, the other guy seemed pretty chilled.

“I have no idea why you’re doing that but, let me grab my jacket.”

*

Hongjoong quickly hated how there was nothing to hate in that jock. He was called Jongho, had explained to him that him and his friends had decided to do a little road trip during summer break, of course, he was going to university with a scholarship for sports and when Hongjoong had grinned at it, he had laughed. He had a very round face, still looking so young and innocent even when his body looked like one of a superhero – he had also laughed at that when Hongjoong had told him, blushing slightly -, his lips were in a heart shaped form, and when he smiled widely they would turn into an adorable gummy smile. His eyes were dark and seemed to always sparkle, and when he was intensely looking at him, Hongjoong could feel his cheeks burn.

Jongho did not ask about him, did not ask for any explanations on why he was here, why he only seemed to possess two different shirts, a leather jacket and a now broken car. He only wondered about the tattoos on his arms and on his neck, listening carefully the sometimes not very deep meaning of it, he complimented the red colour of his hair, and Hongjoong felt his heart drop.

They actually met several times after that one shared dinner. Once night had fallen and Jongho’s friends were too asleep to care, he would sneak out and they would meet in front of Hongjoong’s room door.

Hongjoong hated how attracted he felt toward him. He hated how Jongho gave him all the good reasons to come back to him.

“What did jocks do to you?” Jongho asked one night. It was sudden and Hongjoong frowned.

“It’s a complicated story.”

Jongho stared at him, his intense gaze diving into Hongjoong’s, “I don’t mind complicated.”

The smallest lowered his look, hiding how his cheeks turned red at those words, “I didn’t stay too long in high school,” he begun slowly, “but whenever I went they would call me names, and everyone would follow them because they were the cool kids and I was the weirdo. I don’t blame those who followed them, no one wanted to be me.”

He stayed silent a second, looking at the stars, “I didn’t want to be me either.”

He thought Jongho would say something but he did not so he kept going, “I was too different, I guess? And different doesn’t serve you that well in high school. But it got worse because I-”

He took a deep and long breathe and locked his eyes with Jongho’s in an unexplainable burst of courage, “because I’m gay.”

Jongho did not move back nor leave like he had expected him to do. He stayed there, and nodded, still covering him with a warm gaze, “I’m sorry,” he said.

“You already said that,” Hongjoong teased, “and it doesn’t matter, it was a long time ago.”

The jock frowned, “it matters. I know what it’s like.”

Hongjoong looked at him, confused, “you know what?”

“Being bullied because you’re gay,” Jongho explained, he was looking straight in front of him, “I know what it’s like. They only stopped when I became physically stronger than them.”

He felt his breath cut, like he had received a punch into his stomach. “I didn’t...” he started, “I never thought you would...”

“Well, not everyone is what they look like, right?” Jongho answered playfully, “you would know that better than anyone, wouldn’t you, Hongjoong?”

Jongho laughed and Hongjoong followed him quickly. Yes, of course, he would know that.

*

Nights seemed to be eternal when they were shared with Jongho. Hongjoong had never felt so light in his life, never felt like he was wanted somewhere like he was in Jongho’s company. Jongho told him about university life, the courses he was following, the clubs he was in, his campus dorm-mates and how annoying lovable they were.

It took him some time but eventually Hongjoong told him about his own life. How he had dropped high school too young to even pretend going back to studies now, not even feeling like it was his path anyway. How he had stolen the car of his foster father the night of his birthday, how it felt like a soothing and beautiful revenge to how careless and violent this sixth foster family of his had been. How he had never met his real parents because his mother had abandoned him when he was a baby and he had never heard of a father. How he was earning money by waitressing in dinners, fast foods, bars in cities nobody ever went.

Their lives were so different yet, Jongho seemed to understand him. To understand his restless feeling, the itching sensation of not knowing what was he supposed to be in a world that had never wanted him anyway. Jongho had a family that had eventually accepted him as he was. Hongjoong had himself. But Jongho was the first person to ever listen to his stories, to his feelings and to his point of views, accepting his exciting sides as well as the most sad ones, never showing any pity, just full and entire compassion. And for that Hongjoong fell in love with Jongho.

They were sitting on the roof of Jongho’s car, in the middle of nowhere, stargazing while talking about everything and anything when it hit Hongjoong hard. The chills he got every time Jongho would touch him, the heavy weight on his stomach while still feeling like he could fly any where with him by his side, the way he was waiting for each day to go by so they could meet. The way Jongho made his heart beat so fast, it felt like dying yet like being alive.

The realization hurt him more than he had expected it, making his anxiety burst into his veins like a poison, “Jongho,” he said.

The latter, who was in the middle of a story, stopped and looked at him. They were so close their hands could almost touch, and Hongjoong’s heart dropped in his chest. “Yes?”

He took an inspiration, he was scared, so scared but it was better to break everything right now than be hurt later. “I think I like you a lot more than expected and, if you wanna leave, please just do it now because I just don’t want to-”

The end of his speech was cut short by Jongho’s lips on his. Crashing almost too brutally in a desperate gesture, like he had been waiting for years to do it, like he had been craving for it. The thought that he had felt like that made Hongjoong blush. He answered the kiss with equal passion, his hand rushing to grab Jongho’s, while his other hand moved to the latter’s cheek, caressing it with the softness that was not in their kiss. “I’ve been waiting for you to say that,” Jongho whispered at the corner of his lips. Hongjoong could feel him smiling.

They kissed until they were both out of breath, until their lungs screamed for air. Hongjoong suddenly felt like a shy teenager, his whole body was burning with desire and attraction toward the other man and he could not believe what was really happening. He could not believe he was the main character of this scene.

Jongho took him in his big arms like he was the most delicate flower, like he was so precious he could be broken if not being taken care of correctly. He kissed his forehead, the tip of his nose, his ear, his jawline, chastely, slowly, lovingly. They stayed like that a little bit more, Hongjoong curled up in Jongho’s arms, silent, observing the stars, sometimes kissing each other without daring to go further more.

Hongjoong felt safe, he felt like his heart was gonna explode of happiness. Jongho made so much sense in his life, no matter if they had met a few days before, Jongho made everything that had led Hongjoong there, into his embrace, so worthy.

*

Hongjoong learned after that Jongho had rearrange his trip to stay there, in that stupidly cheap and uncomfortable motel, to be with him, leaving his friends behind. He knew Jongho would eventually have to go back to his own life once summer would end but he pushed it away, losing his mind into Jongho’s caresses and attentions.

“What if you come with me?” asked Jongho while stroking his hair.

Hongjoong, who was laying down on his stomach, looked at him with tired eyes, “where?”

Jongho blushed making the red haired boy even more curious, “into my life.”

“Do you really want me to?” he questioned, turning a bit around to face him. The jock gently caressed his naked back, before putting a soft kiss on his lips. “I want to find a way to make it our life,” he answered.

They stared at each other. Hongjoong smiled softly, Jongho’s eyes were always so expressive and he could read so easily all the love and sincerity on it and it warmed his heart, “I want that too,” he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on twitter @woobrioche !


End file.
